Haven’t been here in a while. Let me update my unconscious from my droid.
So since june of 2009… Hmm so much.
September of 09 met and started dating Anthony. Continued this up until recently I suppose, on and off. Met him at oak crest.
Needs to permanently be off. So unhealthy. But that’s love, blind as usual.
Anywho, my mom left in july of 2010. Yeah. I hated her for a while. Still have some sort of resentment towards her. I lost a lot of respect because of how she did it and the events afterwards.
I started working for BCPS in august of 2010, still there.
Still at essex, so undecided.
And now.
Here it is.
My wonderful Mom-Mom Mary.
She passed away.
I miss her, I miss the old her.
I just miss her period.
I love her.
So much.
Every time I hear a train, i’ll think of you and how you would say that it’s going to rain. And every time an ant got stepped on, that meant rain too :)
And getting mcdonalds breakfast with you, you loved those pancakes.
I loved playing with your keys because of those sparkly things that would float.
You’d sometimes get frustrated when I stood in your way in the pantry because it was so small ;)
We’d have tea parties and I would set up two place settings for us and ‘make’ us food as well as I could.
We could always hope to find you on our front porch, ’cause you lived across the street and all.
You always had pretzels available, along with a bottle of wine always.
You were so much of my life.
I still have you, and always will in my heart.
I took a lot from you.
I carry you with me.
I love you.
Forever in my heart you’ll stay, until we meet again someday.
Filed under: cake
Haven’t been here in a while. Let me update my unconscious from my droid.
So since june of 2009… Hmm so much.
September of 09 met and started dating Anthony. Continued this up until recently I suppose, on and off. Met him at oak crest.
Needs to permanently be off. So unhealthy. But that’s love, blind as usual.
Anywho, my mom left in july of 2010. Yeah. I hated her for a while. Still have some sort of resentment towards her. I lost a lot of respect because of how she did it and the events afterwards.
I started working for BCPS in august of 2010, still there.
Still at essex, so undecided.
And now.
Here it is.
My wonderful Mom-Mom Mary.
She passed away.
I miss her, I miss the old her.
I just miss her period.
I love her.
So much.
Every time I hear a train, i’ll think of you and how you would say that it’s going to rain. And every time an ant got stepped on, that meant rain too :)
And getting mcdonalds breakfast with you, you loved those pancakes.
I loved playing with your keys because of those sparkly things that would float.
You’d sometimes get frustrated when I stood in your way in the pantry because it was so small ;)
We’d have tea parties and I would set up two place settings for us and ‘make’ us food as well as I could.
We could always hope to find you on our front porch, ’cause you lived across the street and all.
You always had pretzels available, along with a bottle of wine always.
You were so much of my life.
I still have you, and always will in my heart.
I took a lot from you.
I carry you with me.
I love you.
Forever in my heart you’ll stay, until we meet again someday.
Filed under: cake
my necklace has been catching my cheerios that missed my mouth.
Filed under: cake
I want to go to CCBC Essex for 2 years and major in business, but still take art classes. I want to transfer to Towson and major in Art Education and minor in Photography. I want to open a cafe place that has all kinds of crazy menus… one for vegans, one for vegetarians, one for diabetics, one for anything, one for people with braces. I want it to be cute and I want to live upstairs. And then I could be an art teacher, how cool would that be? yeaaaaah.
Filed under: cake
yaaah, I’m sad. I’m reeeeally, really sad. I’m not so sure if it’s knowing what I’ve done and being disappointed in myself and disgusted with the other person. I don’t know if it’s knowing that my parents still aren’t too happy with me. I don’t know if it’s knowing mommma gerri’s in the hospital right now and I can’t be with her. I’m just really upset. And me being upset is hurting the way I am with people. I really do wish I knew what was wrong with me. But I just don’t. I think I just want to fast forward a few years. I just wish I could save my money. Everything just feels soooo downhill right now. I can’t help it. I just can’t. I hate seeing that stupid KID be faithful to a skank when he never was to me. I don’t want to sound condescending at all, but I am a good girl. I don’t drink, smoke, party, have sex all the time, and I don’t act like a bitch to everyone. I want him to understand. He needs to choose a girl and stick with her. I don’t like him anymore, seriously. At all. I have no feelings towards him. I’m numb to him, for real. And I thought that this would make me feel/look like a slut. But it doesn’t. I did nothing wrong. Life goes on. Someday I’ll find someone who will treat me well. I just think it’s weird that all of these girls know what kind of a person he is but still keep going back to him…. not me though. People like that don’t change. They never will. Believe me. I’m only being cordial to him for my second mama. I just can’t believe out of my seventeen years.. it happened so soon. I feel like every other girl now. I feel no different from them, ’cause how am I? I hate this so much. sooooooo much. I’m saaaaaaaaaaaad. But I just have to get over this feeling. I gave so much and got nothing. I need money right now. more than ever. I need to save for a computer, I need to save up for vacations coming up, I wish my bike’s tire wasn’t flat, I wish I had the one thing that was most sacred to me back. my cat’s biting my leg right now. there’s such bad people in this world.
Filed under: cake
Okay, so all these black people are saying how this is so great (Obama winning) and comparing it to MLK and stuff like that. Who gave them rights and everything? White presidents. Shut up. White presidents did everything for them. It’s not more than a political movement. All it is is political. Everyone’s trying to make it more than that. If it is then wtf has happened to this country? Fucking shit. I’m just mad ’cause white people are going to be a minority in this country in like 20 years. That is if all this world ending in 2012 isn’t for real. Maybe this is why. Maybe the Aztecs are right. Barack Obama won. WHAT THE HELL? I am in no type of debt to black people. I owe them nothing. Nothing at all. All of that old stupid shit happened WAAAAAAY before my time. So everyone can shut the fuck up about being in debt to blacks. ‘Cause fuck that. Toooo much change isn’t always good.
I’m moving to Austrailia.
Filed under: cake
I think people should just SHUT THE FUCK UP.
haha, I cursed.
But, really. People talk way to much about themselves.
SHHHHHHHHUT UP. I don’t care. Nobody really does. Just be yourself all the time, and you won’t have to explain it on the interweb.
I read this all the time..
‘I’m original, I’m in love, You’ll never meet a girl like me. Me this, me that. I blah blah.’
Oh really? I just read the same thing two seconds ago Ms. Original.
I think those stupid about me’s on myspace should say I eat rocks and throw turkeys at my cat in the wintertime.
Ya know?
And stop complaining (even though I am right now, right?) haha, nobody sees this though. But I don’t want to hear you whining via internet.
Complain about me to yourself (blogs or other people) COMPLAIN TO ME ABOUT ME.
If it’s so simple to write it down, type it, or mention it in any way. What makes it so fucking hard to say it to me?
I don’t think I have any best friends an.
